Sun Editor Dominic Mohan yesterday said he was “sickened to the point of madness” by allegations that a private eye hired by the paper has hacked the phones of £161 million lottery winners Colin and Chris Weir.

The former Housing Officer from North London vowed the “strongest possible action” if it was proved rogue operator Craig Gannon had intercepted the Scottish couple’s personal phones whilst they were celebrating their amazing piece of good fortune.

He branded the claims “almost too horrific to believe” as senior executives at the media company met police conducting a criminal investigation into phone hacking.

SKELPIT LUG

Relatives said they could not believe that the Sun would try to intrude in the Weir’s moment of joy. Talking to our Home Affairs correspondent an angry Jim Hansen 45 from, Craighat, Stirlingshire, 2nd cousin of the lucky couple said:

“I’ll gie ye a skelpit lug” (*). Believing a ‘skelpit lug’ to be unpleasant thing our reporter left before events took a turn for the worse.

The recent hacking scandal has added fuel to the claim that the News of the World might not be the only paper to close over the forthcoming weeks.

Home Affairs correspondent Sir Arthur Mitchell believes he has documents proving that the Sun planned to publish extracts of the Weir’s telephone conversations minutes after they discovered they had become the 430th richest couple in the UK.

DISGUSTING

In an unprecedented act of bravery BTN have decided to publish these documents to highlight the fact that far from being a thing of the past phone hacking is still very much a part of News International’s journalistic practice.

The following are extracts of conversations had by Colin and Chris Weir immediately following Tuesday night’s life changing Euro lottery draw.

11.35pm: Colin to Chris: “Wit the nimbers Hen?” (What are the numbers wife?)

11.37pm: Colin to Chris: “Git the fooking nimbers wee yer Hen” (Would you please check the numbers wife)

11:40pm: Colin to Chris: “Git the fooking nimbers Hen, are yooz Peely-Wally or wit? (Would you please check the numbers wife, are you sick or what)

11:42pm: Chris to Colin: “Ken yer reet I am a wee Peely Wally but hang yer weist” (Yes,you are correct Colin, I am feeling a bit ill but wait a minute)

11.43pm: Chris to Colin: “Reet, Are you reet? (Right are you ready)

11.44pm: Colin to Chris: “Aye I’m reet (Yes I’m ready)

11.44pm: Chris to Colin: “Ye sure yooz reet?” (Are you sure you’re right?)

11.45pm: Colin to Chris: “Aye, I’m fooking sure I’m reet” (Yes I’m sure that I am right)

11.45pm: Colin to Chris: “Get on wee et yooz cracked mare” (Please read out the numbers wife)

11.46pm: Chris to Colin: “OK, 7, 19, 38, 42 and 45, lookie stars 9 and 10” (OK, 7, 19, 38, 42 and 45, lucky stars 9 and 10)

There was then a pause of over 5 minutes. The only sound to be heard was the rustling of paper and a barking dog, possibly a Cairn terrier.

11.52pm: Colin to Chris: “Away an bile yer heid ya numpty, ye dinnae ken whit yer talkin aboot” (Fuck off that can’t be right)

11.52pm: “Chris to Colin: “I will nah bile me heid ya Fannybawz, I’m reet” (I’m telling you the truth effeminate man)

11.52pm: “Colin to Chris: “Yooz is one Bletherskite” (You are definitely a Bletherskite)

11.54pm: The Weir’s conversation was then broken up by an, as of yet, unidentified male, possibly ex Celtic boss Gordon Strachan who burst in, obviously the worse for alcohol and said: “ah ett three kebabs last night na noo mah ring’s pure loupin’. (I have just consumed three Kebabs and I’m going to suffer for it in the morning)

11.54pm: Colin to unidentified man: “Pish off awah Ginger” (Go away fruit based fizzy drink)

There was then another pause for approximately 15 minutes. One can only imagine the emotion in the room. The silence was broken just after midnight.

12.10pm: Colin to Chris: “Gonny gie’s a gobble then hen” (Could you put the dinner on now wife)

12.10pm: Chris to Colin: “Gettae yooz wee fat Bassa” (Get it yourself, you are putting on weight small man)

12:20pm: Colin to Chris: “I think wees ginna be alreet hen” (I think we are going to be alright wife)

ABSOLUTELY RUDE

The PM has backed BTN’s calls for an inquiry into phone hacking today, calling it “absolutely rude”.

He said at PMQs: “We do need to have an inquiry, possibly inquiries, into what has happened over the last few weeks. The hacking of the Weir’s phone shows that far from being remorseful News International intends to continue with its illegal activities” (**)

“We are no longer talking here about politicians and celebrities, we are talking about murder victims, potentially terrorist victims, and lottery winners having their phones hacked into.

“It is absolutely disgusting, what has taken place, and I think everyone in this House and indeed this country will be revolted by what they have heard and what they have seen on their television screens”

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(*) I’ll give you a slap on the ear

(**) Mr Cameron vehemently denies that he has ever had vigorous anal sex with Rebekah Brooks.

(***) Rebekah Brooks vehemently denies that her name has ever been spelt ‘Rebecca’

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